La vita è bella
What is your quest in life? Why do you have an Eating Disorder? Have you ever asked yourself this question? I never knew what my quest in life was, I used to think it was a Job at the United Nations and a PhD degree. I remember my freshers week at the university and I told the enrollment department that I am thinking of doing my Masters alongside my Bachellors degree. First week into my Masters I was writing my PhD proposal, little did I know that the demon of Eating Disorder was lurking in the shadows to take over my life.
Ask yourself that what is it you want from life? If you’re quest is a quest for God, then remember that
The Forty Rules of Love- Rule No. 2
“The path to the Truth is a Labor of the Heart, not of the head. Make your heart your primary guide! Not your mind. Meet, challenge, and ultimately prevail over your nafs with your heart. Knowing yourself will lead you to the knowledge of God. ” Here nafs ego is my Eating Disorder and that is something I want to prevail over.
Don’t belittle yourself, don’t give into the negative thinking of your Eating Disorder. You are more than your Eating Disorder. If your quest is a quest for God, then love yourself, remember that you are the best of creation. “How we see God is a direct reflection of how we see ourselves. If God brings to mind mostly fear and blame, it means there is too much fear and blame welled inside us. If we see God as full of love and compassion, so are we.” Elif Shafak, The Forty Rules of Love
In Arabic we say Ana Maghfan– Appreciate Life. Though life in recovery is challenging, I am thankful to God for His blessings that carried me through some difficult times in my life. I’m learning so much about myself and how I should be in order to bring my self where I want it to be (and that is definitely not under the rule of Eating Disorder). Eating Disorders affect thinking, mood, behavior, and relationships. Alhamdulilah I am in recovery. It is a long difficult road, but with each passing month, all I have experienced is lessening of eating disorder behaviours and thoughts. I now feel that the demon of eating disorder will truly be defeated and perished soon Inshallah.
Now I embark on a journey to Appreciate Life and A journey of a thousand miles starts with one step, so I take my first step towards life in recovery with this thought in mind no matter how large the task, no matter how far, how big, how insurmountable something seems, it all starts with just one step.
I am eternally grateful for all the wonderful things Allah has given me and shown me—life, friends, family, insight into my life, and the ability to love and be loved. So in recovery I have learnt to appreciate my surroundings and the things I’m passing. My disorder has taught me to take each day as God’s blessing.
Truly appreciate those around you, and you’ll soon find many others around you. Truly appreciate life, and you’ll find that you have more of it. Ralph Marston.
There’s a lot of good in our lives, and there’s a lot of good we can do for others.
“Judgments prevent us from seeing the good that lies beyond appearances.” ~Wayne Dyer
Why I never want to hit a very low weight again? Simply because I know that going below a certain BMI means going into serious emaciation and mental debilitation. No one dies before their time. Normally what happens is a long tedious process of going into hospitals hours of wait, blood tests, ECG, and intravenous drips and despair and humiliation.
Don’t let the challenge of recovery scare you.
Sufi Mystics say the secret of the Qur’an lies in the verse Al-Fatiha,
And the secret of Al-Fatiha lies in Bismillahirrahmanirrahim
And the quintessence of Bismillah is the letter ba,
And there is a dot below that letter….
The underneath the B embodies the entire universe….
The Mathnawi starts with B,
Your recovery Starts with
Whatever you’re set to achieve, the most important thing to do is to start taking the first step in the right direction towards recovery.
Don’t delay. Take the first step NOW.
But how do you start moving toward this goal of recovery you’ve just set yourself?
Break Your Recovery Goal Into Smaller achievable Recovery Goals by breaking it down and setting a 1st recovery goal that will bring you closer to your final goal.
Aching hearts heal in time, vanished hopes reappear, the disparate mind will be pacified, don’t despair walk on. If the world does not turn to your whims these few days, cosmic cycles are preparing to change, don’t despair walk on. If desperation whispers you’ll never know God, it’s the talk of hidden games in the veil, don’t despair walk on – Hafez
In Recovery I have always looked at following Life Inspiring Tips by Great Sufi Poet Jalal ad-Din Muhammad Rumi:
“Run from what’s comfortable. Forget safety. Live where you fear to live. Destroy your reputation. Be notorious.” Rumi
“Do not be satisfied with the stories that come before you. Unfold your own myth.”
“Wear gratitude like a cloak and it will feed every corner of your life.”
“Why should I stay at the bottom of a well, when a strong rope is in my hand?”
“As you start to walk out on the way, the way appears.”
“If you are irritated by every rub, how will you be polished?”
“Your task is not to seek for love, but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it.”
Learn From Suffering
“The wound is the place where the Light enters you.”
Don’t Be Concerned With What Others Think Of You
“I want to sing like the birds sing, not worrying about who hears or what they think.”
Do What You Love
“Let yourself be drawn by the stronger pull of that which you truly love.”